Happy 8th Birthday Mason

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Uncategorized

My little prince who is not so little anymore, happy birthday. You are such a gem and we are so grateful for everything you do. I can’t believe the patience you have towards your two younger siblings. You are honestly the kindest kid I know and I’m not saying this because I’m your mother. Your heart is so pure and I’m so proud of who you are. Being the oldest is such a huge responsibility, although I don’t want to bear the responsibilities on you, I see myself relying on you all the time. You take your siblings to the washroom without asking, I think the skittle reward is enticing for all of you lol. You watch your sister and brother and tell me to take a break, I enjoy that way more than you will ever know. You are so fun to be around and I love you more than words can say. You are almost as tall as me and your feet is creeping to my size. I want you to stay little longer but watching you grow is also fun. I never want you to feel that you have to parent Jay but you do it so naturally. It’s funny but you are just a kid. A kid who deserves to be a kid and not have to worry about this or that. Of course there are moments where you ask how come we spend so much time with your siblings and in reality it isn’t fair […]

Thankful we don’t have that

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Uncategorized

I’m reminded from time to time how hard it can be for other families who is struggling on a daily basis. Today as I picked up J, his classmate had a seizure right in front of us. Well right behind me, I heard a big bang and when I turned around he was on the ground seizing up. He wears a helmet full time and I now understand why he does. He hit the floor pretty hard and as the teachers were in panic mode my heart broke a lot for this child and his family. I provided the timer on my phone so we can time the episode because if it is longer than 3 minutes they have to give him some medication. It lasted a long minute and as I was walking back I gripped Jay’s hand hard thinking how thankful I am he doesn’t have seizures. How can your perspectives not change when you witness a glimpse of the hardship other families have to endure. It is hard especially during the frustration and meltdowns but our bad days is likely a good day for some. Comparison is no good but when it makes you thankful, I think it’s ok. It makes me grateful and I trek through another day. To those who have many hardship conditions, I stand by you so you are not alone. I will continue to learn more about whatever it is so I can be more aware and spread awareness.

Off to a not so good week

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Struggles, Uncategorized

Baby girl had diarrhea on Monday so I kept her home. It wasn’t too bad taking her to drop off and pickup as Jay wasn’t fussy thankfully. However I kept baby girl out as I ran errands all day and she only had a short nap at 9:30 so by 3 she was ready for another nap. Only issue was this is also the time Jay normally poops. I took him washroom and decided to just take my chances and left him in the basement while I put girl for a nap. She struggled but finally went down and that’s when I heard water. What does water mean??? As I dashed down to see if he is ok I got a woof of poo smell. He attempted to use the toilet after the fact but instead of cleaning he made things 100 times worse. He took off his pants and underwear and attempted to throw the poo down toilet and flush the toilet. I kid you not, it is the biggest mess ever. The trail of poo is from the whole toilet (I literally mean every single square area of the toilet) to floors and walls and sink and stool to turn on tap to light switches. If there are poo horror movies, this will be a scene from it. I wasn’t mad at him as he is clearly trying and also showing signs he understands but let’s just say spending the next 45 minutes sanitizing and bathing him wasn’t […]

I wish I can understand why you are so sad

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Uncategorized

His frustration is to the roof today. Every morning is a crying battle. If I was to guess, I think he’s tired and lazy to come down but at the same time hungry. Don’t mess with this boy’s food, he will eat you alive. Sometimes he cries and makes the little one cry and in turn makes him cry harder. All this chaos in the morning can’t be good for the older one. Somehow we all manage to get out the door not too terribly late. I’ve noticed the little one starting to imitate J with his meltdown. Really of all things to learn you have to learn this one? This am was a real struggle and it sure didn’t help when the day started before the sun was out. He has these LEGO markers and his little hands just couldn’t hold them all. Every time one drops he gets so angry and frustrated. He would start stabbing himself with the markers and cry harder because it hurts. I can’t protect him from hurting himself all the time and when I don’t catch him it hurts me watching him cry. My beautiful child, only if mommy can help you become less frustrated. He can be laughing one moment then full on bawling the next. When I look deep into his eyes, his sadness really gets to you. How can a child this small have such sorrow and sadness? No dinner tonight again. He’s on some food strike. Literally the full […]

Bad nights for too many nights

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Sleeping Issues, Struggles, Uncategorized

We’ve lost count of how many nights it’s been since a good night. This has got to be the worse string of bad nights ever. He typically up 2-6 am and some nights he is crying for the full hour before resting for a bit only to continue the crying. On the bright side he doesn’t demand to go downstairs anymore and lays in bed playing at first and then crying when he is exhausted and tired. I suppose so many bad nights gets to you and the hubby tapped out at 8pm and here I am taking over. When will this child sleep? I’m exhausted and have a long night ahead of me. We’ve tried everything we can think of but he still wakes up for hours. Hope this bad night streak ends tonight.

Autism Ontario: Free Webinar Women on the Spectrum

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Uncategorized

Women on the Spectrum: A discussion Friday, October 12th from 12pm – 1pm To register. Join Anne Gingras, Christine Jenkins and Stephanie Moeser for a preliminary discussion about the visibility and challenges facing female identified and women on the autism spectrum.  We invite you to learn from their rich experiences and encourage you to take part in the discussion about issues such as “masking”, seeking diagnosis in adult life, health care and more! ***Please note if you can’t watch the webinar live, registering gets you access to the on-demand version which will be available roughly 48 hours after the live presentation.***