When we had our first child the in-laws pressured their ways of parenting a lot to a point it got out of hand. Not much changed after my second or third child. I mean literally when baby girl was born the in-laws took matters to their own hands and cut JB’s hair because they thought it was too long. Let’s say it was so hideous the hairdresser had to comment. I’m sure along the way they were likely reminded of the hardship of raising 3 young kids since they had 3 of similar age gaps but I really think JB has changed them. Clearly I know JB’s diagnosis has changed me so maybe a combination of me changing and them changing.
They are more understanding and no longer use the guilt trips they use to if we can’t make it over. If we can’t go over, they come to us. They don’t come empty handed but literally do a big part of our shopping for us. They bring fully prepared food with all the fixings, snacks and fruits. My older loves fruits and this is good since there is a balance of healthier treats. When the house is a bit too overwhelming, they clean too. What I am most thankful for aside from the food is their love towards my kids. It warms my heart seeing them spend time and interacting with JB. Their visits usually comes along with help me fix this or what is this letter about but their love is real and for that I’m speechless grateful.
Don’t get me wrong they still do things that are very very questionable but the new me now tolerates a lot more compared to before. I understand they are doing it because they think they are helping. The reality is usually different and sometimes the help causes more headaches but they are trying their best. Being parents is not a easy job and I’ve come to respect all the moms and dads out there. I am thankful for everything they have done for us and I’m more thankful my children get to spend time knowing their grandparents.
JB has made me a better mom, a better daughter in-law, a better friend, a better person. I will continue to strive to better each and everyday.